Psalm 130

By Ashrei (Ima Sari Wisenthal)

A psalm of Teshuva - finding alignment, hoping for an awakening and placing trust in God. In many Psalms the darkness of the night is used to describe the experience of depression, pain and loneliness. However, here, even the night doesn't seem so dark anymore.

Some commentaries suggested that we have fear of G-d, making us want to seek forgiveness. Yet I find no fear in this psalm, only a beautiful awe and deep desire to have a full Teshuva; to be fully returned home - for our soul to find its’ deepest peaceful state. The source of my conflict with this common understanding can be found in verse 4, where the word תורא is usually translated as ‘to fear’. In contrast, I believe it should be translated  as ‘to be seen’, or ‘to receive a revelation of G-d.’

Furthermore, most translations approach the word ‘Israel’ as discussing Israel - the people.  Yet, the text is clearly speaking about an individual struggle - a single and personal challenge is being faced. I suggest that King David is reflecting on Jacob’s process of doing Teshuva - of Jacob reaching his highest revelation; if G-d redeemed Jacob (Israel), surely he (David) can hope for his own personal redemption and revelation, his own intimate and personal encounter with G-d. David asks: if I am doing all the right things, I try to live in alignment with Your ways, I place my trust and hope in You, I even place my soul under Your watch at night, can You please listen to my deepest prayer, for you to cleanse my soul, as you did with Israel (Jacob)? 

שִׁ֥יר הַֽמַּעֲל֑וֹת מִמַּעֲמַקִּ֖ים קְרָאתִ֣יךָ יְהוָֽה׃

A song of ascents.

From my depths I called for You, G-d;

אֲדֹנָי֮ שִׁמְעָ֪ה בְק֫וֹלִ֥י תִּהְיֶ֣ינָה אָ֭זְנֶיךָ קַשֻּׁב֑וֹת לְ֝ק֗וֹל תַּחֲנוּנָֽי׃

G-d, listen to me, may your ears be attentive to the sound of my pleading for mercy;

אִם־עֲוֺנ֥וֹת תִּשְׁמָר־יָ֑הּ אֲ֝דֹנָ֗י מִ֣י יַעֲמֹֽד׃

If I guard myself from sinning before you G-d, my Lord, will you awaken me?

כִּֽי־עִמְּךָ֥ הַסְּלִיחָ֑ה לְ֝מַ֗עַן תִּוָּרֵֽא׃

For with you there is absolution, for the sake of your revelation;

קִוִּ֣יתִי יְ֭הוָה קִוְּתָ֣ה נַפְשִׁ֑י וְֽלִדְבָר֥וֹ הוֹחָֽלְתִּי׃

I aligned myself, G-d, my soul was hopeful, and for His word I was yearning;

נַפְשִׁ֥י לַֽאדֹנָ֑י מִשֹּׁמְרִ֥ים לַ֝בֹּ֗קֶר שֹׁמְרִ֥ים לַבֹּֽקֶר׃

I give my soul to G-d who will preserve it until morning, guarding it for the day. 

יַחֵ֥ל יִשְׂרָאֵ֗ל אֶל־יְה֫וָה כִּֽי־עִם־יְהוָ֥ה הַחֶ֑סֶד וְהַרְבֵּ֖ה עִמּ֣וֹ פְדֽוּת׃

Israel will hope to return towards G-d, for with G-d is loving-kindness,

and He redeemed him many times;

וְ֭הוּא יִפְדֶּ֣ה אֶת־יִשְׂרָאֵ֑ל מִ֝כֹּ֗ל עֲוֺנֹתָֽיו׃

And He will redeem Israel from all his sins.